I had an epiphany today. My girlfriends and I are constantly struggling with our identities. Are we "Mommy," are we "wifey," are we who we think we are or who we want to be?

For me the struggle began in 2006; I felt as though I was merely a milkmaid for my first born son. He nursed so often that I could hardly eat enough to keep my energy up! On the plus side - I lost my baby weight very quickly, but I also ended up resenting him for "taking away" my previous identity.

Then came my twins in 2007. They were born nine weeks prematurely. I dove right in to that circumstance and lost myself in the drama of a long hospital stay, pumping around the clock to provide milk for them and balancing my home life so that my oldest son did not feel left out.

Now, the twins are 27 months old and my oldest is four years old. It is still a struggle to be a good mommy and not have selfish, "I have lost myself and I want to run away" moments.

My girlfriends and I struggle with this daily and talk about it often. So I am making it my year-long obsession to attempt to find the balance between being Mommy (and a damn good one at that) and being Me (and a damn good one too!)